Before I met my husband, I wasn’t one to have a checklist or set list of preferences for what he was going to be like, what he looked like, or what his personality would be. I really only desired a man who loved the Lord and would love me. It was a pleasant surprise when I saw him for the first time, and my heart skipped a beat. There was an instant spark and peace that overwhelmed me. Since that first glance, smile, and unforgettable moment, well, I have been twitterpated. I have talked about how, after I met and got to know my husband, our lives just fit together like perfect puzzle pieces. It didn’t feel like there were areas I had to squeeze in to make it fit to his; it just clicked perfectly. It was easy, and it just felt right. If you’ve read my blog before, I’m sure I’ve even mentioned it in a past post.
I had an understanding that we were the two starting pieces of the puzzle as we started our lives together, and as we grew our family, we added more pieces to that puzzle, revealing the picture of the life we wanted to have. The more we added kids to the family, the larger our surrounding puzzle naturally grew. I have loved the life we have built, along with the process of adding and changing what our final picture of life would look like.
When plural came along, I had the hardest time imagining how it would work adding another person to his puzzle piece that I’ve already been connected to. I just couldn’t wrap my mind around how the whole picture would change, and it felt like it was the meshing of two completely different puzzles together to create ugly chaos. Though each picture on its own could be absolutely beautiful, I didn’t see how it could mesh and make sense by being joined by a single piece. Like a sunrise and a sunset, they are opposite; how would they make sense together in one picture?
Out of the blue, I was standing in the kitchen tending to my tasks at hand, and something clicked—a new perspective. It was an aha I never considered, and it just melted my heart. All along, I’ve been thinking of it wrong! My husband and I were never just two pieces that perfectly fit together while building the picture around us. But instead…
He is the border of the whole puzzle!
I’m a piece that was designed to fit into the puzzle of his life. Any additional wives will be a piece that was designed to fit into the puzzle of his life. All of his children are designed to fit within the confines of his borders. We are surrounded by his protection, his love, and his life while being a part of the bigger picture that creates his family.
As we began the journey of understanding plural marriage, it felt as if we tossed the puzzle of our marriage on the floor and had to start completely over, making the pieces we had already put together scatter everywhere. However, it was just the beginning of understanding how to rework the puzzle, recognizing the true border pieces, and how important it is to start there. Once the border is secured, all else begins to fall into place.
Once I realized that all along he had been the border, it was easier to understand that as our life together changed, his border was able to expand to continue to encompass those he was responsible for. His love grows, his compassion grows, and his heart grows. And that truly is amazing to see.
So, we are not a jumbled mess of a picture after all; we are just still working on adding all of the internal pieces to reveal the grand picture that will be displayed. I am excited to see what beautiful image God creates in this life my husband is building within his family.
I am honored to be a piece in my husband’s puzzle.
Comments